The Ghosts of Girlfriends Past
An inside glimpse of three mysterious women from the past. Revealing how it went down & what was learned.
Inspired by Robert Greene’s Best Seller “The Art of Seduction.”
Creative Director: @GraffitiLyfeMovement
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The Story of The Charmer
The Charmer had everything I’d been searching for. From the moment I laid eyes on her I decided she would be mine. The look, the drive, the discretion. On paper, The Charmer’s resume was unblemished. The Charmer’s strength is her alluring attraction. With no effort she entrapped my imagination with the idea of what could be. My infatuation for her was slightly intoxicating. The Charmer was loyal, popular, and good looking. We shared a handful of mutual friends and a taste for the finer things. I guess you could say complimented each others aura… Enhanced it even. Contrary to our past precedents, we dove into things expeditiously. Side stepping the tedious hours required to become more formally acquainted. With only green lights in sight, we decided tacitly that we would grow on the go. Our excursions were lavish and the memories became unforgettable. These trips perpetuated a fantasy lifestyle that we both individually desired. Between charm and a genuine sense of entitlement, The Charmer had a way of effortlessly getting what she wanted from me. She indulged and I allowed it. For me, I had The Charmer; My Trophy. And smugly, that was enough for me.
The people loved the look of us because we peered naturally. On this level we belonged together. We both made sacrifices to satisfy the other and did things we had done for no person previous. The gift and curse of unfamiliar territory is that it’s not always what we perceive it is. Consequently, no one could tell us that we were not meant to be. The descend came when the infatuation began a descent from it’s peak. When the extravagant journeys and public admiration could no longer mask what we failed to examine from jump. It was Father Time who revealed the incompatibilities and stifled the stunt. The burden of charm is, well, pretension; a person preoccupied with self. The Charmer’s entitlement became a nuisance and I became a headache myself. Expectations had been established and behaviors were reluctant to change. The tension was only amplified when my criticisms began conjuring wane. I showered improvement but what she needed was acceptance to rain. Perhaps I was too intense, or was The Charmer’s contentment to blame? Either plane, both sides too stubborn to budge… The Charmer and I were losing the game but our business was lowkey. Instead of addressing the plays I chose to pageant my Trophy. We huddled for OT but it was too late for X’s and O’s. We weren’t exes but oh! We were texting and oh so busy tallying points in the Blame Game. Resentment seeped in and it spoiled our fame claim. I saw first hand that “Hurt people hurt people.” Unfortunately, I was not exempt to the strain. The prescription was absence. Only time could help us heal back the same; The way the charmer had me? I’ll never feel that again. What a tragic dilemma when the one you love most is the one causing the pain.
Letter to The Charmer
Hey, I was just thinking about you and checking in. How is everything? It’s been a minute since I wrote you a letter. I wonder do you still have those old notes saved to your email. It’s crazy thinking about it now, but those letters were really the only writing I did back then. Back when things were fresh and everything was new. Fresh like the day we started talking and we took that one picture you hated lol. *shrugs* I thought it was cool or whatever. I think we were at a cookout… We made eye contact and you looked away coyish. I knew you’d seen me before, but I was unsure if you’d be interested in seeing me. Luckily, I had some juice in my system so what did I have to lose? I teased you and you cracked the corniest jokes (the usual!). Na I’m kidding, you used your charm and it became evident that an attraction had lived between us all along. It’s a good feeling when the one you like likes you back, isn’t it? Remember I deleted all my other girls numbers out the phone for you? Next thing I knew we were on an island! Didn’t even care though, just wanted to make you feel special. It was supposed to be an amazing trip, but we spent half of it in a fight. We had such a charming way of irritating each other. You’d probably say, “Well you were better at it,” but I swear you could write a book on it, or maybe I’ll write a blog… I do miss your family and friends though. They are really nice people. I wonder what you say when they ask you about us. Sometimes I blame myself, contemplating what I could have said or done differently. I sit and wonder if things could have ended better, or, not ended at all. We talked about new ring, new house, new city, new mommy. You wanted smooth sailing but I’ve always been Tsunami. Without fluidity, water never broke. Our highs were surfs UP↑, but our downs were so draining. My perception is you were young and needed me to be a wiser, more patient man. At this point we are both students and we must learn from our mistakes. I wish for you and I wish the best for you, and I hope you understand that dilemma. Just in case you never find the words to articulate your feelings, I would like to share the things I learned from you…
Lessons from The Charmer
What I learned from The Charmer is that Loyalty is Royalty. Despite the disagreements, I trusted The Charmer. I never worried about where she was or what she was doing. That’s a huge sigh of relief considering today’s relationships. Trust should never be taken for granted. Chris Brown made a song and it said, “These…” Well, never mind. Point is, when we’re able to trust someone we’re able to respect and share more abundantly. The Charmer made it easy for me to do this, so in return I treated her like a Princess.
What I learned from The Charmer is that Fools Rush In. When love is on the line, it’s better to just take the time to understand the unique intricacies of a person before you commit. “Them” being the person and also the intricacies themselves. THEN make a conscious decision as to accept those factors into your life. With people, fast is slow and slow is fast. I encourage us all earn the rewards of patience. Even if the resume is flawless; Nobody is perfect. It’s wiser to read the small print before you sign, check the box, and click “I Agree.”
What I learned from The Charmer is that People can’t change People. People can only change themselves. What people say about you or do to you does not change who you are, but it can affect your behavioral compass. The goal is to turn negative behaviors around and move people seamlessly in a more positive direction. Listen and let live. People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care. So here’s the speed code; Criticism & Nagging = Slow. Encouragement & Praise = Fast. Change is an inside job, it only comes from within.
The Charmer was gorgeous with a sweet heart and I really loved her truly. I only pray she doesn’t let her radiant charm outshine her inner beauty.
I do hope that you understand; I’m just a Student with a Message.
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